The Personal Blog Of Steffi Lewis

Founder & creator of YourPCM ...


Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real

What's holding you back today?


Posted by Steffi Lewis on 13/02/2020 @ 8:00AM

Fear. We've all felt it. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of death. It stops us from doing many things. Sometimes, fear is useful when it keeps us out of danger, but mostly it's a throwback to an earlier time; a time of Sabre tooth Tigers and the subsequent effects of poking one with a stick ...


Fear of beasts with great big sharp pointy teeth is irrelevant in the 21st century unless we live somewhere like the wilds of Canada, are armed only with a blunt stick and are surrounded by a pack of hungry wolves. Yes, fear would be very useful then; fight or flight anyone? I'd probably run away too!

Though we have a whole new set of fears to contend with in this day and age and two of the commonest are fear of rejection and fear of failure. What we're actually scared of is the unknown. What we should really be scared of is doing nothing.

"If I was to do X, what would happen? I don't know
and that makes me quite fearful!"

Well, everyone has that problem, but what everyone has - in different proportions - is courage. As John Wayne said so brilliantly, "courage is accepting your fears and saddling up anyway!" and I agree with him. Sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!

And this is where we need to dig deep, find our courage and go for it. Whether it's a new business venture, a change in your relationship status, facing a life-threatening illness or even just doing a new hobby for the first time. If we accept that we are fearful - and just do it anyway - then surely we have a better chance at a positive outcome?

Regular readers will know of my ill health over the past couple of years and how I was one breath away from my head exploding in 2012 and my brush with cancer in 2014. Friends on social media will also know that I've lost a couple of good friends recently. These lovely people were cut down in their prime, without showing signs of ill health and leave loving families behind them.

"The human condition; nobody gets out alive!"

So knowing that you could drop dead at a moments notice, are you just going to accept the status quo of your own life situation or are you going to understand that you're fearful, find your courage and pursue your dreams regardless?

I had a conversation with a friend recently and she said "you know what Steffi? You used to talk about having offices around the world and you always painted such a beautiful picture of your success. Where's that dream gone?" With some embarrassment, I had to reply that I was fearful of pushing myself to the limit then something going pop in my head again.

But you know what? I mulled over what she said and decided I was going to "feel the fear and do it anyway" which is another great quote in itself. Yes, I could die in a heartbeat, but I'm damn well going to be following my dreams if it happens, although those dreams have changed somewhat since that conversation.

And if it doesn't happen? Well, I will find my success and have the satisfaction that I build something great, something lasting, something which may just get me into the footnotes of history. I don't want much do I?

"Fear is just false evidence appearing real!"

We always think about what could go wrong, so let's start thinking about what could go right instead! Go on, I dare you ... find your courage and go pursue your dreams. From this day forward, I know I will be!

Love, light and logic ...



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#NLP #Psychology #FEAR

About Steffi Lewis ...


Foodie, sci-fi nut, cat lover, brain aneurysm & cancer survivor, countryside dweller, SaaS entrepreneur, developer and networker.

Published my first website in 1993 for the Open University and am highly experienced with Windows Servers, SQL Server, HTML, Classic ASP, JavaScript, and CSS.

I've also worked as a professional photographer in Los Angeles, USA and been a vision mixer and producer for live television in my time.

I live in a village north of Milton Keynes with my two cats, Baggins and Gimley, and a large planted aquarium full of unruly tropical fish.


01908 875991